Just a Quick Update

I thought that I should send out a little post since I was in such a bad place the last time I was here. The weekend ended up going smoothly. Friday was horrible. Saturday was bearable and Sunday was Easter and a celebration. Good Friday and Andrew's birthday are the two hardest days for me. Holy Saturday or the day of his death are also hard but not like his birthday or the thought of Good Friday. The pain of knowing that his birthday should be a day of celebration and all that I'm missing just hurts. As William grows I just wonder how much he is like his older brother and I can only imagine. It's also hard to imagine that I would have never known William if we had never gone through our loss. I'm so thankful and blessed to have William. Yesterday on the way to Matt and Millie's house Allyson was "chatting" to herself in her car seat. She was telling me how she was talking to her brother last night. I told her William was in bed with Mommy and Daddy. She told me "no mommy I was talking to Andrew". I asked her what he said. She said "he said to tell Mommy not to be sad because she didn't see the Easter bunny". We hunted Easter eggs on Saturday and afterward she found me crying in my closet. She thought I was crying because I didn't get to see the bunny! Either way just her innocent thoughts comforted me.