Update on the "New and Improved Me"

So a couple of months ago I wrote a blog about changing some things in my life and working on "finding myself" this year. This is my last year to be in my twenties and there are a few things that I don't want to take into my thirties. With the focus being on the grief process we are still going through, dealing with life stressors, and the extra physical weight. So I guess you can say I'm working makig myself "lighter" both physically, spiritually, and emotionally. ;)

For the grief process Brian and I started going back to counseling about a month ago. We are currently going weekly and I think it is really helping to open some doors that we have shut over the past 2 years. We are finding each other again and healing the past. I have to admit that Brian and I lost each other after loosing Andrew. He focused on work and school and I focused on Allyson and my pregnancy. Neither of us were focused on each other. Like I always say we are all a work in progress. We have learned that through our experience we are changed forever but we will come out of this stronger. I also want to thank Elizabeth, Sherri, Millie, and the girls at work (you know who you are) for listening to me and helping me with my journey.

To help deal with my life stressors I'm learning to be less hard on myself. I don't have to be the perfect wife and mother. My friend Tracy has a saying..."It is what it is" so like it or not this is me flaws and all. I'm taking time out from my role as a wife and a mother to focus on me. I love having my monthly Mom's night out with the girls and have even started going to the gym (okay don't fall out of your chair laughing). This is my time to clear my head and it does make me a more sain person. :)

Since the middle of January I have really been focused on loosing some weight. I'm really impressed with myself that I have been doing this for almost 6 weeks. I think the longest I have every attempt to exercise or acknowledge what I ate has been for about 3 days. I'm happy to say that as of this morning I have lost 20 pounds! Again my friend Tracy has been my inspiration. She is a great person, an awesome mom and a "real" person. She lost some weight last year and looks awesome. When I don't feel like working out I just think of her. She is doing it and taking the kids with her to the gym. Thank you Tracy!!! I also want to thank Millie who is totally the reason I now am a member of a gym and actually have a trainer for the next 6 weeks. It's great to have a friend right beside you as your getting your butt kicked at the gym. Thanks girls!

Where does the time go?

I can't believe that it has almost been 3 weeks since my last post. As you can tell once Brian is back in school we barely have time for anything. Things are going well. I have updated about the kids on their website. Thanks for all of the comments via email. Seems like it is hard to comment on this blog without signing up. So if you would like to comment just email me and I can post it on here (or just keep it private :) ). Don't forget to check out my favorite things. I'm going to make an attempt to post more often on my list. This time of year is still my seasonal down time. I hate the weather. It's still cold and raining ( I know Elizabeth is rolling her eyes at me since she lives in Seattle) but it really makes it hard for me to be motivated (okay now other are rolling their eyes thinking that me unmotivated is still very motivated). For me this is my down time. I can't wait for summer!